I'd rather have an awesome marriage and no ring than a stunning ring and a shitty relationship. This is just how I see it. I'm in it for the experience, not the things, but if the Universe is taking requests and wants to conspire with him to propose with a pretty thing like a ruby one, here's mine! Thank you in advance!
Today I'm daydreaming HARD about what I would love for my future engagement ring to be when a lucky man presents it to me and asks for my hand in marriage. I am not in the market to get engaged right now but that doesn't mean that a grl can't daydream about what kind of ring she secretly hopes her Prince Charming proposes to her with! A part of getting what you want is identifying it: what it feels like, tastes like, smells like, looks like; you get the drift. Then you allow yourself to feel good about it right now and then carry on with your life knowing that your request has been received and is being worked on by God/the Universe. I even like to pretend sometimes I have whatever it is that I'm desiring already. Sometimes I get immersed in the experience and how it could play out and feel. It's a lot of fun if you have a vibrant imagination like I do.
For a while I've known that I didn't want a traditional, Western engagement ring. The world and Americans have been socialized into thinking that "diamonds are forever" and "diamonds are a girl's best friend" and that they are the only way to symbolize/consummate a real engagement/marriage. Pure hogwash. I have nothing against diamonds, except that some of the conflicts that many of them come with (especially after learning more about them over the summer when I visited South Africa where they have many diamond mines- like De Beers diamonds), but I don't need a diamond to confirm my engagement and upcoming nuptials. My dream engagement ring has a ruby gemstone. I can't decide yet what band I want it set on though. Gold or white gold band would be nice but a silver or platinum band would be nice too. I'll leave that up to the future fiance. The ones pictured in the post represent what I want. I also love what the ruby gemstone symbolizes: undying love and passion. Hell yeah, I want a marriage that represents and embodies that.
I've done show and tell with my best friend, close friends, sisters and mom about this so that if/whenever this Mr. Right asks any of them for help about it, they know what to suggest to him. Rather or not he goes with the suggestions is a different story but hey, I'll know he wasn't confused about what I would absolutely adore because my family and good friends are ninjas for me. And let's be honest, if he truly loves me, he's definitely going to try his hardest to get something I will adore. I'm just sayin.....
Let's keep it all in perspective....
Now obviously, an engagement ring is a GIFT from a man that, he should have chosen with his heart that is a token of (hopefully) him loving you with everything in him and his desire to build something special with you. This GIFT to you from him represents some of that. I'm not saying you have to like the ring he may choose for you but you should APPRECIATE it because engagement rings are a social construct, not legal or Universal law. It truly is a GIFT. They He doesn't HAVE to give you a ring. People get married without rings all the time.
I will be happy with any ring (even if it was a Cracker Jack box ring- no lie) my Mr. Right selects to ask for my hand in marriage with because, ultimately, it is about the relationship/marriage, not the ring (or the wedding). I'd rather have an awesome marriage and no ring than a stunning ring and a shitty relationship. This is just how I see it. I'm in it for the experience, not the things, but if the Universe is taking requests and wants to conspire with him to propose with a pretty thing like a ruby one, here's mine! Thank you in advance!
I can already picture it sitting lovingly on my left hand, ring finger just looking fabulous radiating infinite amounts of passion and undying love. I may have to start paying more attention to my nails when this beauty rests on my hands. What an adventurous life together that it will represent and share in!
All my single ladies, what does your dream engagement ring look like? All my married ladies, is your ring your dream one or close to it? Don't forget as the marriage ripens, upgrades happen. If your original ring isn't your dream, the upgrade may be.
The Universe has cool ways of manifesting our desires in ways we never imagined. Things are great but, in spite of it all, the experiences are way better. But come on, let's just be grls for a minute and talk about our dream rings!!!!!
Milan is a New York City based, creative writer and the founder of AGrlCanMAC. She's a self proclaimed accessories junkie who's passionate about healthy living, adventure, books, crystals, the Law of Attraction and arts & crafts. AGrlCanMAC is a resource for women of color all over the world who want to look good, radiate good and feel good at the same damn time.
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